Now that beautiful weather is once again upon us, it’s time to take cover.  What’s that?  Before going out for that leisurely, after-dinner walk with your family or friends, better refresh yourself on E.A.P.  For the untrained or uninitiated that would be Emergency Avoidance Procedures.  In the event you haven’t noticed, Bloodsport Cycling is back.

Let me ask this as nicely as I can: What the hell is up with these people?

Exactly when did paths and trails, the ones designed for cyclists and walkers, become the sole territory of cyclists? 

Here in Minnesota, staying active outdoors is nearly as popular as the Vikings.  Whether it’s 80 degrees or 10 below, you’ll see folks walking, jogging, cycling, rollerblading or on cross country skis 365 days a year.  You see people from all walks of life, all ages and all body types out doing something to stay fit.  So what is it about the ones on bikes that seem to believe the paths and trails, and streets for that matter, are theirs and theirs alone?

I’ve about had my fill of wannabe Lance Armstrongs.

Is there anything more awe-inspiring than being approached by the group of cyclists living out their dreams of the Tour de France?  As they approach you, spiffy and clone-like in their requisite skin-tight biking uniforms, NASA-issued sun glasses and colorful helmets, they often admonish you for daring to be on a path with them…a path designed for bikers and walkers.  The thing is, members of Team Genius never seem to realize this isn’t France, the trails and paths aren’t blocked off for them and many of the shadows they see in front of them actually belong to people.  Living, breathing people.  People on the same paths and trails….with them.

But to suggest that cyclists have a wanton disregard for anyone not on two wheels doesn’t begin to tell the whole story.

When they’re out and about, it often seems they intentionally get as close as possible to you when passing.  It’s as if they’re trying to make some sort of point, misguided and juvenile though it may be, so that the next time you accidentally wander off on to a path for cyclists and walkers, you’ll darn well know better.

Today, I was out walking along a lake with my wife and two daughters; cylcists were out and about everywhere.  We were on one of those very paths designed for cyclists and walkers.  Within seconds one after another after another flew by us, missing us by no more than a foot at most.  And bear in mind, we were all to the far right side, single-file, as they’d ride by us.  It got to the point I wanted to clothesline one of these fools.

To be fair, there was one cyclist who gave us a verbal warning when he was about 30 feet from us, yelling “one bike on your left.”  I so appreciated his etiquette, I’d have bought him lunch had he stopped.

There was a time I thought my feelings on this were an overreaction.  No more.  Paths and trails that are made for all demand that everyone, walkers included, show respect and civility to each other.

If Mr. Suburban Minneapolis Cycling God is in training for the Tour de Fargo, don’t do it at the expense of young children, parents and grandparents out for a nice, relaxing stroll.  This just in:  We’re really not as impressed by you, as you are with yourselves. 

Try spending even a quarter of the time you take to outfit yourselves in your “Look Like the Pros” team clothing by being a little more courteous and a whole lot safer when you’re out riding. 

Really, is it asking too much?